Mud
by Floydgarmadork
Summary: Fanfic playing with the idea of Lloyd turning Oni and the consequences of that.


"_Leave_." The voice was so angry. So loud, but Lloyd could barely hear it over the sound of his heart drumming fast in his ear. One thing he could hear tho. The hatred... but the eyes. The eyes were way worse. Lloyd felt his heart drop, as he looked into the eyes of his big brother. Unlike the voice they weren't filled with hate... not even disgust. Not fear either. No, Kai's eyes were filled with pure terror.

Lloyd just stood there. He didn't know what to do. Or well... he did. He should leave. Oh god he was totally supposed to leave. Why was he still standing there? He forced himself to look around the room. His heart beating faster and faster for every face he read. They were all... they weren't mad... were they? He got to his uncle's face. His uncle's face was filled with sorrow, but... there was something else there. No. They weren't mad. They were all terrified. All of them. Of him.

He left. What else could he do? Seeing his uncle's face was the last push he needed and suddenly he couldn't leave fast enough. He'd turned around clumsily. Ran stumbling to the door. Fumbled with the doorknob for what felt like eternity. No one had tried to stop him. Then he'd stumbled out the door into the rain as fast as he could. Then he didn't stop running until his legs physically gave up. Then he fell to the ground not even bothering to try to get up. What was the purpose of that anyways? There wasn't one. So he stayed there. Face buried in the cold, wet mud just crying till he could barely breathe. His chest feeling tight and his throat sore. Even then he didn't stop.

At one point it stopped raining though, but Lloyd didn't notice. He did notice when the sun came up, but he didn't care for its light. After all, it would only reveal what he already knew to be there, and honestly he wasn't ready for that... he never would be. He considered that for a few hours. That he'd never be ready. Was it even worth it to ever have to see it? He could just stay here. Face buried in the drying mud. No one would ever know what had happened to him. No one would ever know what he had become. Maybe that was for the best.

As he had just decided that this was the case, he heard footsteps getting closer. They sounded... far away, but at the same time alarmingly near. It was hard to make out with his face still buried in the mud. He thought about making a run for it, but decided that playing dead, while silly, would actually be a better option, as he couldn't really make out how far away the footsteps were, nor what direction they were coming from. It only now occurred to him, that he on top of that had no idea where he was.

He heard the footsteps get nearer, then he felt pressure on the earth, right next to his right arm, as if weight was being put onto it. Then he realised way too late, that maybe running had been the better option as he heard Kai's soft voice carefully call out to him. "Lloyd?" A hand carefully grabbed his shoulder. There was something... odd about the voice. It was unusually hoarse and unsteady. Almost as if- "Kiddo?" At Lloyd's lack of response, Kai's grab on his shoulder tightened. "Greenie? Hey!" There was almost something desperate about his tone... he sounded afraid, but... not afraid of Lloyd.

Lloyd wanted to react. He really did. He wanted to respond to Kai's voice. Wanted to just hug him tight. Bury his face in his chest and sink into his warm hugs instead of this cold mud, but he couldn't. He couldn't face Kai. Not when he... not when he's...

Kai somehow managed to get him up and sit. Kai somehow managed to pull him into a hug. Lloyd didn't fight it. He was too tired and besides... if he fought it, maybe it would give Kai time enough to look at him and realise what he was, and then he'd change his mind. Lloyd quickly melted into the hug. Feeling the cold from the mud and the night slowly fade away when challenged by Kai's warmth. He instantly relaxed, as Kai ran his fingers through his hair, in slow calming motions. Giving out a sigh of relief as he finally felt safe. Barely even remembering why he'd run away. He didn't even hear the thousand apologies Kai muttered under his breath during all this.

On the way home, the feeling of warmth and safety stayed over him as a soft blanket, protecting him from the whole world itself. Then the blanket was brutally ripped off him as they got back to the monastery and Nya went to wash the mud away. Suddenly he remembered all of it. Why he had to leave. Why he could never come back.

He watched in the mirror in horror as Nya washed away the mud with a damp cloth that felt way too warm against his skin. Almost burning. He tried to ignore it as Nya gently pressed it against his face, making circle motions, revealing the face of a monster... Lloyd's face. A monster's face. The dark scales covering, painted with silver like swirls could've mistakenly belonged to his father. Lloyd felt his heart stop for a minute. His breath stuck in his throat. Nya seemed unfazed by it though, and so did the others. As if they didn't even see it.

Afterwards Master Wu wanted to talk with him. Lloyd prepared himself to hear that same word again. Heck, he even wanted to hear it. Rather that than having to see it again. Painted on his uncle's and friend's faces as sorrow and fear. His uncle sat down, right opposite of Lloyd. Lloyd held his breath, waiting for the word. "Lloyd," here it comes. A faint ringing sound was starting to make itself known in his ears. "I'm so sorry about last night. We all are. We're gonna figure this out. Okay?"

Lloyd just stared at his uncle. The running had suddenly gotten unbearably loud and maybe that was why he hadn't heard it clearly? Surely, he couldn't have heard that right. He shook his head, trying to figure out what exactly his uncle had just said. No result. "You... you don't want me to leave?" The ringing was louder than ever and his vision was beginning to get slightly blurry. He had no idea what they were saying. He wouldn't even know they were saying anything if it wasn't for the fact that he could see their mouths move.

The ringing was so loud that he didn't even know if it was there or not. Then everything turned dark and he felt the cold, wet mud against his face.


End file.
